It's Part Of Our Divine Nature To Desire Beauty

I've been thinking a lot about beauty and appearance lately. I guess you could say I've gone through some phases in life regarding thoughts and beliefs on beauty and whether or not it's okay to desire to be beautiful. At one point I thought it was wrong to desire beauty because we need to focus more on our spiritual development. I felt guilty for my desires to be beautiful and the time I spent getting ready and looking nice because I had a false belief that all that really matters is what's found within. What I didn't realize then that I do now is our spiritual and physical beings are completely inseparable. The Spirit can't shine out of a careless body. 

Beauty is much more than having flawless features, it's about taking power over our physical appearance through self-discipline. It's about eating healthy, taking care of our skin, enhancing our features, caring for our hair, exercising, and keeping a clean home that sends a message out into the world that we know we have power over our lives and the gifts (aka our body) Heavenly Father has blessed us with does matter. Desiring beauty shows that you care; care about yourself, about Heavenly Father's creations, about life, and about aspiring to become great. Looking our best at all times allows us to make greater connections and influences more people because showing you care develops trust, and you touch and influence lives when people feel as if they can trust you. 

President McKay is reported to have said, when asked by the Brethren if Mormon women should wear make-up, "well, even an old barn looks better when it's painted!"

By our divine nature as children of a loving Heavenly Father, we were made to strive to be beautiful, strong, confident, and poised daughters of God. Heavenly Father is perfect and our goal is to strive to be like Him, I can only imagine how beautiful and well poised our Heavenly Mother is. I can only imagine the self-discipline she has and the time she took to work on her beauty and grace.

Every single daughter of God holds within her a gift, a gift that is an Eternal burning and longing to be feminine, to be lovely, to be honored and cherished. It is part of our divine nature to rise to the election of Goddess. Every daughter of God would be more productive, motivated, and more enthusiastic towards life if they felt peace with their physical appearance and with their surroundings. 

It will take self-discipline, but we are here to learn how to take power over our physical bodies. It takes dedication and self-discipline to wash your face before going to bed, to brush your teeth, to put on make-up, to take the time to style your hair, to eat healthy and say no to treats when it matters, to getting enough sleep every night, and to work out. If you've already developed these habits, then you know it's something you don't even have to think about or make a decision about, you just do it because it's now ingrained in you. 

If you haven't already made it a habit for each of the following above, then start today! Self control and discipline comes with practice, and with increased practice comes mastery. Every time you do this, you will gain a little bit more self-respect (self-esteem) and it will motivate you to do it again and again creating a habit. Start now! Self-esteem shines when you feel good on both the inside and out. 

It starts with Christ, and Christ wants to help you feel beautiful, master self-discipline and follow the commandment found in D&C 88:119-120, 124:

"Organize yourselves; prepare every needful thing; and establish a house, even a house of prayer, a house of fasting, a house of faith, a house of learning, a house of glory, a house of order, a house of God;

That your incomings may be in the name of the Lord; that your outgoings may be in the name of the Lord;that all your salutations may be in the name of the Lord, with uplifted hands unto the Most high...

Cease to be idle; cease to be unclean; cease to find fault one with another; cease to sleep longer than is needful; retire to thy bed early, that ye may not be weary; arise early, taht your bodies and your minds may be invigorated."

How the atonement helped me overcome self-objectification

I was sitting in my PR Cases & Campaigns class bright and early this morning and we were watching examples of social ad campaigns. We observed this ad produced by Dove, one that I have seen numerous times previously, and the Spirit just hit me so strongly, right there in class reminding me of how incredible the atonement is! This is a bit of an interesting example and I have many, many more experiences with the atonement, but today I feel the need to share with you how incredibly powerful the atonement is through my personal self-objectification experience. 

Last year, from January to August 2014, I was more insecure of my personal image than I had ever been in my life. I feel prompted to share my experience with you even though I'm ashamed of it. I'm ashamed of it because of my perception now. I'm ashamed of it because the thoughts that I'm going to share with you are real and I know now exactly who they were coming from, the adversary. I'm ashamed because of the moments I wasted loving myself for who I am.

I had never really had much acne until January 2014, and it hit me hard. I was going through some stressful situations at this time, so maybe that triggered it, I have no idea because I'm still fighting it as I write this, but the words I am going to use to describe how I felt don't even slightly compare with the emotions that I feel now. Waking up one day with blemishes all over my face was a very new and real thing for me. I felt so self-conscious every single day. On every single date I went on, I wondered if they could see, I wondered if they noticed it. It was so hard for me to see past my acne, I would spend hours in my car crying, asking and pleading for comfort and trying to find my worth in the world. These words don't do justice to my feelings or emotions. It wasn't just my acne I was concerned with, I just didn't feel beautiful and glamorous like I desired. I don't look like a pageant girl, I never had. For some unknown reason the thought that I wasn't pretty enough and that's what mattered in this world would not leave me alone. My favorite place to go was the temple, I felt so beautiful in the temple. I felt my image didn't matter there. 

But on the days that I wasn't at the temple, every single morning I would wake up, put on my make-up, say "This is as good as it's going to get" and then I would cry and cry. How I looked was on my mind much more than I can proudly admit. These thoughts of what I wanted to change about my face and features consumed everything in me. I wanted to look like the stars you see on TV and in magazines. I would stare at these pictures, then go back and look in the mirror and I nit picked everything about myself. I'm telling you, these unhealthy thoughts consumed me like crazy. 

I didn't think any guy would ever desire to love me or marry me, because I didn't have flawless skin. I told you I'm ashamed to write out this post because huge mistake I had made in my thought process, mistaking guys for being that shallow. If you think a guy won't love you because you have acne or any other imperfection you would consider a flaw, then you are searching for the wrong guy. The right guy won't care one bit, I promise you this! Sure, there are plenty of conceited guys out there who will only date girls with a certain image, but do you really truly want to be with one of them? Love isn't based on image, attraction is very important in marriage don't get me wrong. But the right guy will be attracted to you just the way you are, I know this to be true. The right guy for you will first fall in love with you for your heart and everything will fall into place thereafter. 

I can distinctly remember sitting in my car, reflecting on my imperfections a few different times, I remember the exact location of where I was and how deeply my heart was grieving. Once again, I remind you that my description of my heart break doesn't even slightly reflect the worthlessness and heartbreak I felt based on my appearance. So I was sitting there just sobbing, and I asked Heavenly Father for a little help and understanding of why I felt the way I did and how I could feel beautiful and valuable once again. This was the beginning of my thought change process that took place through the atonement of Jesus Christ. 

Months passed by, every day I would wrestle with the Lord in my thoughts of my worth, why I thought it was all based on appearance during this time, I know not. July came and Colbie Callat released her new song 'Try'. I loved it but hated it. I would listen to it over, and over, and over again trying to convince myself that I didn't need to "try" to be beautiful and I already was. It didn't help that when Colbie takes off her makeup and all in the music video, the girl is still absolutely flawless. I should post a picture of me with no make-up on so you can see what I am talking about. 

As I prayed more and studied more of what it meant to be a daughter of God, my heart changed and grace carried me. It wasn't easy and it wasn't all over night, but I remember one day thinking, "You know, I stopped critiquing myself and crying over my image a few weeks ago. I really like who I am and I can see Christ's countenance in my image. It was then that I understood what Elaine Dalton meant by this quote; "There is no more beautiful sight than a young woman who glows with the light of the Spirit, who is confident and courageous because she is virtuous."

Suddenly I didn't care about looking like the girls in the media, I didn't care about comparing myself to others, and I didn't care as much about the flawed skin underneath my foundation. I just didn't care, and I felt beautiful just the way I am and I'm so grateful I was able to recognize that it was the atonement and grace that brought me to that point. I don't know why I had to go through those painful emotions over such a worldly thing, but I do know it helped teach me an invaluable lesson of worth and that it's the spiritual things that will always matter. Spiritual blessings can help you overcome or lessen any worldly pain you experience. 

I was spending all that time looking at myself through the eyes of the adversary. It was so damaging because it was distracting me of my divine earthly mission. Satan knows exactly what he is doing, don't let him win girls, fight back!! Did you wake up this morning and see yourself through the eyes of the Savior or the eyes of the adversary? It's a daily choice you get to make but I want to share 5 things that might help you to understand your worth and to feel beautiful inside and out every single day. 

5 actions to see yourself through the eyes of the Savior

1. Spend more time with the Savior

To see yourself through the eyes of someone, you really need to get to know them and understand who they are and what they believe in. Spend more time with the Savior than you actually spend getting ready in the morning. In fact, I challenge you to double the time. If you spend 30 minutes on your hair and makeup each morning, spend an hour with the Savior.

So how exactly do you spend time with the Savior? Learn of Him, learn of His teachings, learn of His attributes, and learn of His life and His legacy.

Here are a few suggestions...
- Watch bible videos of the Savior.
- Read '21 Days closer to Christ'
- Study Chapter 6 in Preach my Gospel about Christlike attributes
- Pray for gratitude and an understanding of the atonement + of grace
- Watch for Him daily in your life

2. Pray for an understanding of Individual worth and a love for who you are

So you've heard about individual worth, right? It's spoken of and recited all the time in Young Women's. Here's my favorite part about it though, even if you don't fully grasp what it means or understand how it applies to you personally, IT'S STILL THERE! Even if you don't feel individual worth and God's love pouring in your life or heart at this moment, that doesn't mean it is taken away. It is NEVER changing. It is perfect. It is infinite. It is there in the moments you feel and it is there in the moments you don't. If you don't understand it, pray to feel it, pray to understand it, pray to see it in your personal life. If you are diligent with this prayer, I personally testify to you that you will see it and feel it. I don't know when or how, but it will surround you and without a doubt you will know if you will just stay diligent!

3. Listen to empowering messages that teach you about who you are. Study what it means to be a daughter of God, more than you have ever studied anything ever before!

For me, this one was essential because if you are doubting your worth based on your outer beauty, you're missing the most important teaching in this church. For me, I had to really understand who I was and love that more than all else before I could learn or understand any other principle. This is the foundation for anything else to be built upon. Article of Faith number four teaches us that faith is the first principle of the gospel and if you don't understand that you're a beloved daughter of Heavenly Father and all that that entails, then you're missing something and that's why for me, this was the best place to start. 

Some great places to start:
- Daughter of a King playlist 
- Daughters of Heavenly Father talk
- Mosiah 5 
- This Lesson 

4. Dig deep into the scriptures

Really immerse yourself in the scriptures and get to know them inside and out. The goal is to know them so well that you find yourself reflecting more on scriptures and their stories instead of all the negative thoughts of worthlessness this world can have you believing. You want to be so focused on the goodness and gems the scriptures offer that you won't have time to really focus on the insecurities that you may be faced with. Study scriptures based on individual worth. Study the stories of the woman heroes and make it a goal to become as noble as them. 

5. SERVE

Lose yourself and go serve others! If you find yourself thinking too much about yourself, it's time to forget yourself and let Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ take care of all your worries and concerns while you serve Them. You are the chosen one to serve those in your circle of influence. If you find yourself dwelling on imperfections and insecurities, pray about, forget it, then go bake cookies and take them to a friend! I promise you it works. You deserve a treat too! (No bake cookies are my favorite, just in case you were wondering ;) 

Then watch this short clip!

But please girls, 
please remember that you are NEVER, EVER alone!

#BeYOUtifulChallenge

Today we have beautiful Kimberly to share a challenge with you!

Beauty is something that's talked about frequently, but what is it exactly? I'm sure we have all heard that the world defines beauty as a set of physical requirements one must meet. For example, to be "beautiful" one should be: skinny, but not TOO skinny, tall, but not TOO tall, etc. etc. Then again, we have all heard the opposite definition that beauty comes from within and that what makes someone beautiful is their personality. I happen to disagree with both definitions. Why? Well, I believe that beauty is a feeling, an emotion. I believe that in order for a woman to be beautiful, she must FEEL that she is beautiful. You can tell a woman that you think she's beautiful a million times and she won't believe you until she sees herself as such. Sad, but true.

A few years ago, I received a Canon rebel XTi (AKA one of those "fancy" digital cameras) for my birthday. For a while I did not know what I wanted to take pictures of. I grew up in a family of professional photographers that each found their niche. I started off by taking photos of landscapes, flowers, and even just capturing memories at family parties and events. Last year, I had a friend approach me about wanting me to take some pictures of her for a fun "photo-shoot". She knew I had a nice camera so she wanted to try and see if she could use nicer pictures for her Instagram and other social media accounts. So, I agreed and decided to expand my hobby and try to see if portraits would be my niche. We picked out a random location to use as the backdrop and I just started snapping and clicking away. It was a lot of fun and both of us enjoyed it. I emailed the pictures to her later on that night and she told me she couldn't believe how pretty she looked. To be honest, I don't really like to do intense editing outside of fixing the brightness, shadows, and exposures of the photos I take. It made me really happy to know that she saw she was pretty in the pictures. So, that's basically what I've been trying to do, which is make girls see for themselves that they really are beautiful daughters of God. Once they start seeing that, they start feeling it more and more which shows on their countenance and makes them even more beautiful. Also, I think showing someone that they're beautiful is a lot better than telling them. Knowing that I help girls, even for a moment, see themselves as beautiful is enough for me.

A few weeks ago, I noticed on Facebook how women were posting pictures that they felt beautiful in. I decided to take that challenge over to Twitter and it was SUPER successful! Girls were posting pictures of themselves using the hashtag "#BeYOUtifulChallenge". I will not take credit for the idea, but I sure do endorse it a ton. Posting the pictures may not have given someone an automatic, 100% self-esteem boost but it did give them time to reflect and notice the beauty they hold. And that's what I think beauty is.

If a woman has to wear makeup and put on pretty clothes to see that she's beautiful, let them be. And if a woman feels beautiful without all of those things, let them be. All that matters is that they feel beautiful and see it for themselves. That's what Heavenly Father wants. Society does not give a great example on how we should see beauty so it is up to a few of us to rise to the challenge and see ourselves as beautiful. I challenge you all to try and see for yourselves. See the divinity in you. Wear your crowns proudly, you beautiful princesses! Stay beautiful, ladies.

Love,
Kimberly
(Metaphorically Crowned)

I took the challenge - Here are three pictures that I feel beautiful in. 

Don't forget to try the challenge out for yourselves! :)

#AerieREAL - Why I support this campaign

My passion and purpose in this life is to empower girls to have strong self esteem and confidence. When I heard that Aerie, a sister company to American Eagle launched a new campaign called "Aerie Real," I knew immediately that I wanted to jump on board.

Images in the media have a HUGE influence on the way girls portray themselves.

The more I study girls self esteem and the more I gain a stronger passion to do something about it, the more I have been thinking and analyzing the example I am setting to be a role model for them. This is the reason I changed my profile pictures from Twitter and Facebook.

A few weeks ago, the picture below was the image I used for everything. Guess what? This photo has been photo shopped. The lighting, my hair volumized, a thinner chin...it's simply not the real me.

To be honest, sometimes I would stare at this picture and think, what would it take to become THAT girl in this image? I would critique myself for not being able to obtain the image captured in this altered picture. What a waste of time on something that doesn't even matter. Why strive to be the impossible? Beauty isn't flawless, it never has been. 

No one in the entire world has ever been born perfect - perfect hair, perfect body, perfect skin - none of this can exist without a ton of work, surgeries, money, time, effort and photo shopping. So why is the media so obsessed with making girls appear effortlessly perfect?

We were given bodies to use as instruments. We use them to eat, run, laugh, work, and play. Our bodies were never meant to be ornaments that are decorated and admired by all.

Be proud and confident of your body just the way it is! If you want to workout, great!
But do it for the right reasons!

I've been on a workout routine the past several months. Why? Because I want to be healthy. I want to be the girl that proves she is stronger than she appears to be. I want to be the girl that sets goals and knows how to achieve them. My favorite part about working out is realizing that I am capable of so much more than what I tell my mind. If you work out, do it for YOU - don't do it to impress anyone else!


Thank you Aerie for not altering images. 
Thank you for giving girls permission to be real.
Thank you for allowing girls to feel good about what they look like from the inside out. 
Thank you for not retouching what was already beautiful!

An open letter to Aerie

Dear Aerie,

I LOVE your store. I have been shopping there and supporting your business and attire since the day it opened. I love everything about it. The sweet girls. The store setup. Fashion, clothing, and style. The stickers that remind you of your worth. The ribbon that is used to tie each bag with love. All of it, it's all perfect!

Then you launched the #AerieREAL campaign and my heart exploded. Body image and self-esteem is something I have a HUGE passion for. I suffered from low self-esteem growing up. Growing up, I was so skinny, it was part of me and I had no control over it. I remember hearing rumors or being asked questions of if I had an eating disorder. I never did. As I grew up, I had a very fast metabolism and I would just eat whatever. I kept thinking I was invincible and I would never gain weight. One day I put on a swimsuit and noticed I had love handles. I was in disbelief, where did these come from??

Every individual is different, we are different for a reason and purpose. As I started following your campaign, I would start to examine each and every model. I kept thinking, I could never be a model for you. My sides and hips are just 5 inches too big. Then, to be honest, I started critiquing my body even more. Just knowing that your models appeared to be flawless and they weren't even photoshopped made me go crazy. It was actually worse knowing I didn't look like them than just believing they had been retouched. I remember one of your models had a mole on her stomach in the exact same place as me, so comforting.

So I propose to you or more like BEG you to stop only using models that are so thin and only one size. Beauty comes in every single size, shape, and color. You preach this, but you aren't teaching this. What about girls like me who have a little extra in places they wish didn't. I work my butt off, getting up at 5:00 am every single day to work out. The results don't always show either. I don't do this to change my image. I do this to prove to myself that I can. I do it to get healthy and to take charge of my body. I work hard, I eat right and I look like this.

In the media's eyes, I am flawed like crazy. In the eyes of the world, I am unproportioned which isn't what Hollywood beauty is about. But #AerieREAL is about REAL girls! I'm real. What about us? Can't you show us some models who look like us?

My passion and purpose in this world are to empower girls to have strong self-esteem and confidence. I figured one of the best places to start is with a HUGE name brand that shares my same vision.

Together we are going to make a difference and show the world what real natural beauty looks like! This is the real me and yes, I believe the real me is enough and perfect just the way I am.

Love, Ashley

Self Esteem Advice Column

 Guess what's back??? - That's right!!! Dear Ashley Marie is back!! 
An advice column for girls everywhere!!!

Dear Busy girl,

Dry Shampoo is a GREAT alternative to washing your hair mid week.

Is your hair blonde or brunette?

BLONDE - sprinkle a little baby powder in your hand then take a big cheek brush 

and lightly brush the top of your hair with the powder, using your hands to massage it in!!

BRUNETTE - sprinkle a little mineral powder in your hand and do the same thing as above!!

Baby powder can't be used with brunette's or it will look like you have dandruff or something else crawling around in those beautiful locks!!

Good luck!

Sincerly, Ashley Marie

Let's Take Back Beauty From The Inside Out!

I truly believe that God created us in his image. We all look unique and different. Different eye shapes, different hair colors and hair textures, different lip shapes, different face shapes and tones, different body shapes. Every single feature is unique and different and I believe the features that you have, have been given to YOU on purpose!! God created you, he does not make mistakes. 

It has taken me a VERY LONG TIME to figure this out. I got caught up in the Self-Objectification curse. It is the perfect trick brought on by Satan. It steals away your happiness and when you aren't happy, you feel worthless and it becomes easier to sin. When you are happy and confident in your own skin, you have a greater desire and ability to serve others and let your light shine!

Very well played Satan, but guess what?! We are going to bring beauty back to it's fullest from the inside out! Every single feature on a person is beautiful. Birth marks, acne, scars, etc.... God created all of these and ALL of God's creations are beautiful! Who says blemishes aren't beautiful? Seriously who created that "ideal beauty image"? I know many celebrities, beauty industries for profit and beauty icons have influence in the way we perceive beauty today, but why are we giving them power? God knows what he is doing, he created every single perfection and imperfection ON PURPOSE!! And no matter how you perceive it today, I am telling you - IT IS ALL BEAUTIFUL!!

SO, LET'S TAKE BACK BEAUTY!!!

How? It starts with ourselves! It starts with YOU. The thing that helped me the most was prayer. Pray to God to understand your purpose and why you are here. Once you understand this, being the "world's kind of beautiful" just doesn't matter any more. It really doesn't, because no matter what you look like, no matter what color your hair is, no matter what your body shape is - it is NOT going to take away from the mission that you have on this EARTH!! Heavenly Father has a plan and a purpose for you to fulfill, don't get distracted. Stay strong and true to who you ARE on the inside and let that shine from the outside.

Ignore the photo shopped pictures, ignore the celebrities that catch your eye, ignore the comparisons of friends because you most certainty have something that they don't have to offer the world. Heavenly Father has given you many, many gifts, talents and blessings!! Focus and use those. It's so much easier said than done and I could talk about this all day. However, my words won't mean anything until you get down on your knees and you pray with real purpose and real intent. Pray for help and understanding in knowing the purpose and the life that God wants you to live. Pray with humility and honesty and an open heart and mind that you are willing to follow his will. Pray for help in overcoming insecurities, doubts and fears. Your prayers will be answered on his time but have faith that they will be answered.

Remember who you are and what you stand for. Virtue, humility, charity and love will always be seen as beautiful. God wants you to know of your worth which is so priceless. Satan wants you to forget it, it is an easy and simple distraction to get you to loose hope and faith so you loose sight of God's plan. Hang on to your worth and God's love.

Here's the challenge:
For every single person you see today - find a quality that you like about them and then say aloud or in your mind "This person is so beautiful, especially in the eyes of God. And I am beautiful too". You will see all sorts of beauty in people that you have been missing!

Once you recognize the beauty in everyone else - you can't miss the beauty that is shinning right back at you through your reflection!!

THE FIGHT IS ON TO
 BRING BACK BEAUTY FROM 
THE INSIDE OUT!!!

Bridal and Wedding Makeup

 My gorgeous cousin Chelise married a marine this past weekend

and it was so beautiful and their love is so true.

I got the amazing opportunity of doing her makeup

for both her bridals and her wedding.

We decided to keep her look simple to allow

her stunning natural beauty to shine.

I had so much fun playing with her eyes as she has the most stunning

and pure blue eyes.

Don't you think she could be a model?!

I mean seriously she is BEAUTIFUL!

Makeup I used for her bridals:

{I wanted to play up one feature and since her eyes are already gorgeous - 

I chose to make her lips pop}

Foundation - Ivory 1

Translucent Powder

Cream Blush

Bronzer 

{Very lightly applied}

Cream Eyeshadow

Eyeshadow - Chocolate Kiss

Eyeshadow - Hazelnut

Eyeshadow - Spun Silk

Black Eyeliner

Eyeshadow - Coal (on top of liner)

Lash Love Mascara Black

Lip Gloss - Pink Luster

Makeup I used for her Wedding:

{This time we kept all her makeup simple

so her natural beauty really got a chance to shine}

Foundation - Ivory 1 

Mineral Powder - Ivory 1

Concealer - Ivory 1

Cream Blush

Cream Eyeshadow

Eyeshadow - Almond

Black Eyeliner

Lash Love Mascara Black

Lip Gloss - Au Natural

Congratulations Chelise and Ruben - - so so happy for you both!

Wishing you the greatest happily ever after!

P.S. I need some bloggy button help - email me if you are interested in helping me

for some FREE makeup - - ashleyfrederickson@marykay.com

12 Ways to feel beautiful

                    

1. Smile - How can you not feel beautiful when you are smiling? We all find smiling faces more attractive. Smiling is contagious and you will feel gorgeous when you make another person smile.

2. Breathe Deeply - Breathing takes the tension away and allows you to feel at peace. Make it a point to step away from what you are doing to just breathe.

3. Find something to admire in yourself - When you are unhappy or lacking confidence, we all too often find a flaw within us and dwell on it letting that weakness run over and over in our minds again. How can you feel beautiful when you mind is telling you you have a flaw that you hate? Instead feed your mind with the just one beautiful thing you admire. It can be an inner or outer quality - whatever makes YOU happy!

4. Surround yourself with friends that boost you up - I have two friends that I just LOVE to see because I know they are going to tell me I look beautiful when I walk in the room even if I don't feel that pretty that day. Friends are there to support and encourage you! If you feel you don't have people in your life you can count on to boost you up, start complimenting others and it will automatically be a great leap for a friendship but on top of that, the kindness you gave will come back in your life... GUARANTEED!

5. Stand and Sit Tall - Good posture plays a HUGE role in telling your mind how you feel about yourself. Picture yourself with a crown on your head, and then just focus on not letting the crown fall off! When you have good posture, others will think more highly of you as well.

6. Wear your favorite color - Colors make you feel happy and confident! Find a color that you look gorgeous in and rock it often. You don't always have to wear the same shirt, find a necklace, a scarf or sunglasses that have that color in it and wear it like you own it.

7. Say thank you! - Kindness and manners can change your outlook on yourself in an instant and in return make others feel amazing! You feel beautiful because you made a difference. Say thank you to your grocery cashier, say thank you when the door is held for you and say thank you when someone let's you cut in front of them.

8. LOVE - Love life, love your family, love nature - This world was created with so much beauty and love. Take it all in. When you give love, you feel love and love equates to beauty.

9. Accept compliments - When someone is complimenting you, they are going out of their way to make you feel loved. You may not feel like you deserve that compliment or they don't really mean it but they do! OWN it and be proud of the compliment that you just received.

10. Take time for yourself - We live in a world that is rush, rush, rush. It's not selfish one bit to take time out for yourself. Take a bath, paint your nails - you deserve it all!

11. Get out of your shell - Often when I don't feel pretty, I internally roll up in a ball {like a potato bug} and when it reality potato bugs rolled up are not that pretty. They just get lost and they blend in. How can you feel pretty when you are in a ball that no one even knows exists. Spread your wings like a butterfly and let others see your colors. In other words - focus on others and don't get caught up in your flaws. When you are talking to others and opening up yourself, people don't notice flaws - they notice connections they are making with you!

12. Try something new - I am a girl that loves repetition and consistency but I find when I get brave enough to do something new or something that takes courage, I feel absolutely amazingly beautiful. 

What makes you feel beautiful?

Dear Ashley Marie

Dear Ashley Marie,
What is lash primer and do I need to use it?
Sincerely,
Maddie


Dear Maddie,
Lash primer is an amazing product that gives you lashes an extra lift and helps mascara go on more evenly, smoothly and helps prevent clumping. I love it. I notice a difference in my lashes when I use it. You only need to use it if you are looking for something more to help your eyes pop and your lashes to appear longer and more fuller.
Sincerly,
Ashley Marie

 Buy it HERE

Dear Ashley Marie,
I work, go to school and I am involved in so many projects and groups...I feel so overwhelmed. How I balance my life better?
Sincerly,
Kenna

Dear Kenna,
Sounds like you really are busy. Good for you for doing something valuable with your time. The key to balance is choosing projects that take up time with great care. If something isn't fun for you or isn't something that is really going to help you or someone else in the long run, don't be afraid to say no or turn it down. With that being said the second most important thing you can do is plan plan plan! Have a daily planner either online or on paper but map out everything from 6am - 10pm (you will find you can get more done in the mornings then staying up late at night). If something isn't set in stone for a time, let's say homework - still put it down. Schedule out a time block for your homework and stay true to your plan. It may help you to list everything you are involved with and how many hours you need to spend on it a day or a week. Once you list everything you will find you even have a little room for time with yourself which is vitally important for balance. 
Good luck with all your projects!
Sincerly,
Ashley Marie

Dear Ashley Marie,
What's something I can do to stay positive, even on the days I don't feel like it?
Sincerly,
Girl seeking optimism

Dear Girl seeking optimism,
What a great question. The way we think can be a challenge at times but it is a vital part of our life. Thinking positively can be the greatest reward you give yourself and it can make or break your happiness. Here are some ideas...
1. Remember that all things work for good - even the bad things in life bring goodness and blessings eventually.
2. Put a sign on your mirror that you can read everyday that says "This too shall pass" Just remembering that the hard times don't last long can be so comforting.
3. Practice Positive Affirmations - I will do a post on this soon!
4. Talk to someone whether it be a friend, sibling or mentor about the feelings you have. Just talking to someone puts life in a better perspective.
5. Surround yourself with positive people!
Sincerly,
Ashley Marie